AN ENSONGLOPEDIA OF THE FRINGE
by John Hinton
A is for the AUDIENCE, the reason that we’re here.
B is for the BARS in which we drink our daily beer.
C’s for COMEDY, at which we chuckle, chortle, cringe.
D’s for DAILY GUIDE, with which we organise our Fringe.
E must be for EDINBURGH, the city that we love.
F is for the FLYERS that into your hands we shove.
G’s for GREYFRIARS BOBBY, who’s the loyalest hound in town.
H is for the HUSH descending when houselights go down.
I’s for INTERNATIONAL, the Fringe’s bigger sister.
J is for the JUGGLER who demands that you assist her.
K’s for KILTS, those classy tartan wraps that men here wear.
L’s for LUVVIES; luvvie love is love that’s hard to bear.
M is for MUSEUM, which this year’s where I’m performing.
N is for NEW WRITING: nascent, nervy, nonconforming.
O’s for OPEN ACCESS, which stops Fringe being a clique.
P is for the PREVIEWS that we crammed into last week.
Q is what we hope will form outside our show each day.
R is for the ROYAL MILE from which we stay away.
S is for the STARRED REVIEWS we think are so important.
T is for the TEARS we shed when stars are few, but oughtn’t.
U is for UMBRELLA – it’s a must for your back-pack.
V is for VARIETY, which Fringetime doesn’t lack.
W’s for WALKING, of which you’ll be doing plenty.
X can be for XVII, the number after 20.
Y is for the YEARNING for our shows to worldwide roam,
And Z is for the big fat ZERO pounds that we’ll take home.