Have you ever wanted a taste of a cruise before fully committing to trapping yourself on a boat with hundreds of strangers? Then, may I recommend a Nouvelle Vague concert? This new-wave French cover band brings all the style, call-and-response, and gentle banter of an upgraded holiday package — ideal for keeping warm in the cold winter season.

As Christmas creeps its way around the trees of Glasgow’s West End, you’d be forgiven for wishing you could escape to a warm, all-inclusive holiday somewhere. Instead, you’re in the drafty but comfortably familiar halls of the QMU. Strangely enough, this unusual, holiday-infused concert is also well matched to the atmosphere of Glasgow Uni.

It begins with the completely bizarre stylings of support band Phoebe Killdeer & The Shift—Phoebe herself being a former member of Nouvelle Vague. Phoebe and bandmate Ole Wulfers, dressed in matching white suits, guide the audience through a musical set they themselves describe as something more akin to sounds than music. Their use of sonic vibrations and eccentric, disjointed dance movements has some audience members eyeing their drinks suspiciously. Yet, the pair’s self-aware peculiarity—matched with Phoebe’s intense eye contact and unrelenting gestures—makes it impossible to look away.

While the support act sets a tone akin to afternoon cruise entertainment, Nouvelle Vague take things further, bringing the audience into a more elegant evening show. Everyone is in black, everyone has excellent hair, and there’s a slight sparkle to everything. It lends an element of chic that the QMU very rarely sees. The audience is hooked from the moment singers Marine Quéméré and Shanice Alonya Slona take the stage, prancing up and down with a sophisticated cabaret-style performance, flirting with the audience, the band, and each other with such fervour that you can’t help but blush.

The set list strikes the right balance between recognisable songs and a style easily transformed by the bossa-nova beat. There’s a broad selection of Depeche Mode, a helping of Yazoo, some Joy Division, The Cure, and even Echo & the Bunnymen — all delivered in the eye-catching style of Jessica Rabbit. Not to mention the revelation that The Smiths’ lyrics somehow manage to sound even more melancholy when enhanced with French pronunciation. The style and staging all come together to create an entirely joyful performance, even if it does carry the faint air of a very classy Butlins.

Shanice and Marine are the standouts of the show, keeping the audience captivated from the moment they step onstage. The crowd cheers for every song, sings along to every “la,” and remains utterly hooked on the leading duo’s every move — even as Shanice uses the drummer as a stepping stool and turns the guitarist into her own personal plaything. Their rapport is so strong that even a major sound malfunction barely dents the atmosphere. As the microphone buzzes incessantly — undoubtedly damaging the singer’s ears — a joyful acoustic rendition of “Just Can’t Get Enough” pulls the performers back in, creating a warm, Christmassy moment and a smooth recovery for the band. To top things off, Phoebe returns to the band with a performance which proves that embracing a smoother style doesn’t mean you can’t stay weird.

Nouvelle Vague have the look, talent, and set list to deliver an excellent performance. Their slightly cheesy style is elevated by the suaveness of each member and the genuine ability they all possess. Yet the band’s performance is undermined by one painful truth — a fact that may well apply to most acts but feels particularly potent here, as you can’t shake the feeling that the whole show would be much more enjoyable sitting down on a relaxing holiday, with a mai tai in hand.