Complete The Circuit is our series of interviews with regulars on the Scottish comedy circuit. Each comedian answers our questions then nominates someone else to answer them next, until, having asked everyone who’s anyone we get back to the beginning.
Who are you, what are you and how are you feeling?
My name is Liam and I am comedian. I am feeling good! Aside from all the normal pre-Fringe anxiety, existential dread and overwhelming state of ennui.
When did you first think “I’m a comedian”?
Long before I was ever actually a comedian because I was an arrogant little fuckstick that needed a few hundred on stage deaths for his ego to centre.
When did anyone else first think you were a comedian?
Whatever the opposite of the previous answer is.
How do you like to work?
1) Set deadline far into future
2) Do no work forever
3) See deadline approaching within four days
4) Binge eat, panic write, throw something together and hope it sticks
5) Repeat
6) Profit???
Someone nicks your joke. What do you do?
Dress up as a woman and seduce them. (Assuming its a man that did the stealing, which it PROBABLY WAS #smashthepatriarchy)
What do you like most about the Scottish comedy circuit?
Its diversity. There may be a lot of straight, white, bearded guys on the circuit – but I’m a gemini.
What do you like least about the Scottish comedy circuit?
Dundee.
The Fringe – Heaven or Hell and why?
It depends on your outlook (and whether or not you believe the world is a simulation). Heaven if you like schmoozing, hanging out with coked up producers, and occasional gigging with big names. Hell if you hate all those things but like money. If you believe the world is just a simulation (like I do) then you don’t have strong feelings either way as nothing matters.
What would you ban from comedy?
The audience. The general public. If I could do this without leaving the house or getting dressed I would.
In the kingdom of comedy, who’s the ruler, and what’s your role in the court?
The ruler is the lord God, and there are no roles but that of his loyal servants. May you be struck down for such a blasphemous question.
Give us a comedian we should talk to next?